Ah, comparison. It’s a nasty trap that all of us have fallen into at one point another. I’ve certainly been there. I’ve also overcome many of the comparisons I struggle with, and I promise you I’m happier for it. But, like most others, there are plenty of comparisons I still struggle with. I don’t think it’s something we’ll ever be able to completely overcome (at least I won’t) but we can improve it. Here are a few tips to stop comparing yourself to others, and why you should!
HOW AND WHY TO STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS
Why Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
Comparison is Damaging to Our Self-Esteem
This really isn’t something I need to tell you. You already know this. You recognize the feeling of doubt and low self-esteem that creeps up as soon as you start to compare your life to someone else’s. At the very least, this should be motivation enough for us to halt comparison altogether!
Comparison Puts Our Focus on the Wrong Person
One of the biggest issues with comparing yourself to others is that you’re spending your time and energy focusing on someone else’s success! By focusing on their success instead of your own, you’re widening the gap and preventing yourself from catching up.
Comparison is Unrealistic
There’s no accurate metric for comparing someone else’s life to your own. I regularly find myself comparing myself to other bloggers and what they’ve accomplished. But you know what? Most of those bloggers have been blogging longer than me! So it’s really an unrealistic comparison.
Comparing is a Waste of Time
You guys, comparison is such a waste of time! Comparing yourself to someone does literally nothing to further your own situation. For every hour you spend feeling sorry for yourself because your blog isn’t as good as someone else’s, that is an hour you could have spent working on your blog to make it better! Seriously, think about it. Consider what you could have done with all the time you’ve wasted comparing yourself to others.
How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
Acknowledge Your Own Successes
Instead of comparing yourself to others in a negative way, focusing on the things they’ve accomplished that you haven’t, compare yourself in a positive way. What have you accomplished, something you’re incredibly proud of, that not everyone else has done? Maybe you’ve excelled in your career, or maybe you’re an incredible artist in your free time. You have something that other people strive for too!
Remind Yourself That No One is Perfect
When you jealously compare yourself to someone else, someone who’s life you deem to be perfect, you’re failing to acknowledge that they too have struggles. They have problems in their life, and they have areas of their life that they jealously compare to others.
Keep a Gratitude Journal
If you’re having a hard time reminding yourself of the positive elements in your own life, keep a gratitude journal. I promise there are things in your life to be grateful for, and you probably think of them often when you aren’t busy comparing yourself to others. This way, when you’re feeling really down on yourself and can’t think of a single thing to be grateful for, you can return to your gratitude journal for a reminder.
Keep Your Eyes on Your Own Lane
Simply stop paying so much attention to what others are doing. I promise that over-analyzing someone else’s success is going to do nothing to improve yours. Instead of paying attention to what your peers are doing, keep your eyes only in your own lane.
Get Off Social Media
Social media is a breeding ground for comparison. Everyone puts their best foot forward on social media (or at least most do), so we’re only seeing the absolute best of someone’s life and comparing it to the worst of our life. It’s not a realistic way to measure our own success and happiness. Plus it’s a huge time suck, so getting off social media will boost your self-esteem and give you more time to work on improving your own life.
Compare Yourself to Yourself
For a realistic way of measuring your own success, compare only to yourself instead. Rather than measuring the success of your blog compared to others, measure the success of your blog now compared to the success of your blog six months ago or one year ago. It’s a more honest metric of success and one that will boost your self-esteem rather than damage it.
BEFORE YOU GO
Make sure to check out these other posts you might like on Refined Revelry!
- 7 Things to Do on Sunday For a More Productive Week
- How to Set Goals You Can Actually Achieve
- How to Start a Side Hustle and Make Money From Home
Hi, I’m Erin! I’m an online educator and content creator who helps women reach their goals by teaching them to manage their time and their money. I want to help you design a life you love, so I’m sharing everything I know about goal setting, productivity, planning, and personal finance. You can read my full story here!